Being yourself

Last night my body decided it wasn’t happy just battling seasonal allergies but needed to add a common cold to the mix, the combination of pesky allergies and a cold sent me to bed earlier than usual which meant I had time to indulge in some mindless TV watching since my brain was too bogged down to read a book. I should mention that I am not a regular TV watcher, I have no favorite shows and can’t even begin to tell you what the fall line up looks like. The last time I watched TV with any regularity was when I was pregnant with the daughter and took up watching ‘My Name is Earl’ however once mini-me came that was the end of the TV viewing. The only exception is when my insomnia is kicking my ass and I flip between Nick @ Night, TV Land, Vh-1 and occasionally the E channel. Even Lifetime movies are no longer as appealing as they used to be years ago, too formulaic and too depressing.

So last night while laid up and hacking my lungs up, I settled on watching the E channel and checking out Dr. 90210… why, is that shit on tv? I admit it was my intent to keep flipping between channels but seeing the Black doctor and then the cheese-ball youngish doctor who I swear thought he was a model, piqued my interest yet it was the patients that really got me.

Let’s see, there was a young interracial couple where the young Black man was looking to get some surgery done because despite his daily exercise routine, his abs were not as tight as he wanted them to be, guess he had a hint of love handles and wanted the abs of Fifty Cents the rapper. Apparently the Black doctor who himself had a 8 pack was going to liposculp the brothas body to perfection.. wow! Brotha-man’s  old lady, a young white girl wanted a new nose. It seems they were both performers and wanted even better bodies, now at the end of the show, we were treated to a performance by the plastic duo, if only someone had given them some talent. Now seeing young folks fuck with nature while silly, pissed me off less than the other patient on the show.

The other patient was a white woman who had had several kids, at least one was grown and Moms looked to be just a tad older than me so she was probably just a hair over 40. She wanted a tummy tuck and some new breasts. Now I will confess I like to joke that if I had the cash, I would get both of these done but truth is for the most part I am happy with the body I got. Admittedly after 2 kids, years of breastfeeding and a ton of weight loss, I got the flab and sometimes I am bugged but the older I get I have an appreciation for the body I have, it’s served as a vessel for life, its literally provided nourishment and barring a health need, at the end of the day it just seems wrong to go fucking with it for vanity sake.

I shared all this to say that the older I get the more disturbed I am by the fact that folks are less willing to accept the bodies they were given. Too many of us buy into the media hype that says we must be perfect but who the fuck is really perfect? None of us, who even wants to be perfect? Like I said young folks though it saddens me, I understand wanting more physically but it used to be you got older and with age came wisdom and frankly at 40 wanting the body of a 20 year old is silly.. now I admit I wish I had the enrgy of a 20 year old but these days I look at young folks and I am glad I made it through my youth.

I think its a sad commentary on our society that we even have shows like this on the air and in light of the freewheeling last decade where it seems we all got caught on the consumption roller coaster, shows like this seem to tap into that desire to have more, to be more yet do flat abs, or big breasts make you a better person? I think not. Back when I was in my early 20’s, I had a body that wouldn’t quit and my self confidence was nil, it was only when I stopped focusing on that outer appearance that I came to know and love me.

Shows like Dr. 90210 only seem to reinforce that being yourself is not enough but I think being who you are is more than enough. Shit, if I was single and some cat decided he didn’t like the belly pooch that no matter what I do won’t go away, I’d tell him to take a hike.. I say love yourself and accept what you were given.

Off I go to hack some more and sip my steamy mocha misto.

5 thoughts on “Being yourself”

  1. I saw about half of this exact same show earlier- and can I say that I was so tremendously underwhelmed by the “talent” of the couple with the makeovers, I still have no words to describe such a vapid waste of time and energy. And the tummy tuck/boob job Mom had 6 kids! And then at the end she was dancing on a stage with a pole? Proud of her new body? Where in the heck were her 6 kids while she’s prancing around the club with her rear end hanging out of a skirt with a bunch of 20 year olds? I think everyone on there needed a bit more help than all of the plastic surgery in the world can fix.

  2. It’s the American Way. All show and no substance. That’s how the economy got shot to hell, that’s why our military is stretched thin, and our political system is about who we feel more comfortable having a beer with.

    I’m with you on not wanting to be 20 with a 40+ body. I am a grown woman with grown up experiences. Although I wish the “girls” were a bit more perky – lol! After years of illness and medication, I have some weight to lose and I’m working on it, but I love who I am and who I am becoming.

  3. It’s part of the Social Contract to make the consumer hate him/her self and inspire one to buy more things in order to make oneself feel better about one self.
    Gotta have a new car, new clothes, new hairspray,etc so you’ll be sexier, popular,etc, etc.. It’s like running on a treadmill…You’re moving, but not really going anywhere.
    Shows like this and the commercials that sponser them feed these ideas of self hatred into the often empty minds of the unsuspecting public all of the time.

  4. “Back when I was in my early 20’s, I had a body that wouldn’t quit and my self confidence was nil, it was only when I stopped focusing on that outer appearance that I came to know and love me”

    It is imperative living in this society that you really know and love yourself. You have to fight for it. Because at every corner, you are told that you are not enough. Ever.

    Great post. You had me thinking all day long and I so agree with you and all the folks who’ve made comments.

  5. There continues to be a wide cross section of people who make the decision of going under the knife. There are people of all ages, both men and women, and of every ethnic group. People are constantly seeking a quick fix to their unhappiness with their self image and sometimes the only way to fix that dissatisfaction is through plastic surgery. Plastic surgeons find that the diversity of people getting cosmetic surgery is very high but their motivations are closely related. The bottom line is that the majority of these people want to feel more comfortable with themselves. Yes, it is about appearance. But it is really about how comfort with appearance allows people to be more comfortable with themselves overall. Many different people decide to go under the knife for the main purpose of enhancing their overall comfort levels with themselves and their lifestyle.
    With shows like Dr 90210 the whole country can witness a whole new person emerge from bandages in less than an hour. I personally do not think that these shows are encouraging us to consume more or to necessarily look a certain way. Instead, I feel as though reality shows like this one allow us to open our minds about plastic surgery and become more accepting of those who choose to alter their appearance with surgery no matter what our stance on the issue may be.

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