As a blogger who is also a writer, I spend a lot of time talking and mentioning social media that sometimes I am convinced I have readers/followers who assume I have no life offline based off the reminders/comments I get that twitter is not the real world. Really? I had no idea! You mean the families I work with daily are the real world? Thanks for telling me!
Seriously though, I do have a life offline, one that grows increasingly rich though complex as I and the hubby navigate new ways of being and living. Yet I am reminded as we navigate this new phase in our journey together that there is a reason why it is so easy to use social media so much so that the next thing you know it’s no longer a tool but a crutch. Talking to virtual strangers is easy in many ways! Opening ourselves to our offline friends and family is not easy; in fact it’s downright hard.
I am in my late 30’s and the man is in his 40’s and the sad reality is once you get to our age range, attitudes and beliefs are often set in stone and hard to change. Whether such views are liberal or conservative or somewhere in between, the fact is most of us are not open to change. Which means that when those around us start changing and growing and moving out the box, it can make us feel uncomfortable because often change around us makes us look at ourselves. Sometimes what greets us in the mirror really doesn’t make us happy.
Part of the life changes we as a couple and individually have made, have us opening ourselves up more and let me tell you it’s hard! In fact I find myself lately replaying scenes wondering did I say or do the right thing? Yet knowing my truth and reality makes it easier to stand in and know that no matter what happens it will be okay. Some of us look down on people who over share publicly yet the reality is we look down at people who share themselves in real life, in many ways it’s emotions that are uncomfortable. No matter how they are being emoted emotions are complex and in a world that is moving ever so fast, we don’t have the time to process or the desire.
This post is my public pledge to myself that standing in my truth and reality no matter how much it bothers others is okay.
It might also have to do with our mortality becoming more tangible to us as we get older. Cancer scares and deaths of people we grew up with, seeing our parents get old, new health tests we need to take, and moving away from that procreation phase of our lives. As I get older, I realize I have less time to do something, whether it’s writing, taking a trip to India, making a quilt for my son, dancing with my daughter, *and* making connections with people. I hope to meet up with you in ‘real life’ sometime!
Now googling to find the Steinem quote because it sounds like I really like it a lot. I like your comment, Liz. Ditto.
As you get older, you get more radical. And more comfortable with it all. That’s not me saying this, but a very loose Gloria Steinem quote. I assume it to be very true. I have found that people will respect you more for your honesty than a pre-packaged version of yourself. There’s power in authenticity.