Girl power, do you have it?

My intent today was to write a piece about Obama, but after an impromptu family outing, I decided to scrap that plan at least for today since there are more than enough folks out in the blogosphere commenting on Barry and his changing tide.

Today’s title comes from an incident with my girl aka mini-me today. On the way back from the beach today, mini-me wanted some ice cream, so we pulled into the parking lot of a local place, now the plan had been to get the ice cream and roll but mini-me wanted to sit out in the grass and eat her ice cream. However the menfolk, spousal unit and elder child aka the boy, didn’t initially want to go with the plan; so Mama being the goofball she is said well girls rule so we are eating outside because we have girl power… I know this is corny as hell but mini-me immediately liked that phrase and decided to run around screaming girl power.

Now, some of y’all might be groaning, day-um you are pretty corny up there in Maine, sista. True, I won’t lie but as I was thinking about it just a moment ago, it dawned on me that when I was growing up I never quite got the message that girls had power and I suspect I am not the only woman of a certain age whose folks talked about girls being able to do anything but truth is they didn’t walk the walk. Don’t get me wrong my folks did not explicitly say that I was limited by my gender but honestly, actions speak louder than words and while my little brother who I love dearly, was always supported in his endeavors by my folks, truth is that I was not. I suspect some of the choices I made earlier in life were a direct result of not quite believing that as a girl I had any power.

I have often heard how in Black families girls and boys are raised in different ways and I do believe there is some truth in that, I also think the ways we are are raised or perhaps conditioned by gender also plays a role in the angst that exists today between brothas and sistas.

For me in raising my daughter, my hopes for her are that hopefully she won’t make any of the silly ass mistakes I made like seeking love instead of seeking herself nor confusing lust for love. Instead I want her rooted and grounded in knowing who she is (I also hope she comes to know the Lord to) and having the faith to know she can accomplish anything and that she is not limited by her gender but that inherent in being a woman comes with power.

So, I say to all the ladies that read this, take a moment and look for your own inner girl power, if you are raising a girl, make sure she knows she has girl power. For the men, don’t be afraid to let the ladies in your life know that they have girl power and don’t feel threatned by that power.

3 thoughts on “Girl power, do you have it?”

  1. blackgirlinmaine,
    Growing I was sent mixed messages: you can do anything you put your mind to and girls can’t do what boys do. It was crazy fighting against these confusing messages. In kindergarten my teacher would drag me to area where the girls would quietly play house. I’d rather play soldier with the boys.

    As a woman & wife I choose not to make all decisions otherwise what is the reason for being in a relationship. We share in the decision making.

    One of my prayers for my nieces is that they grow and mature and are not making the same choices regarding life and love in their 40s as they will in their 20s.

  2. Hello there!

    I am so happy that you wrote this post!

    You know how much i am on that bandwagon of telling black women to BE EMPOWERED! I write posts that always have to do with encouraging us to dig deep, to weed out, to take charge and to know what we can control and what we can’t!

    It is wonderful that you are showing your chlid those things that you felt were not shown to you at that age!

    Peace, blessings and DUNAMIS!

  3. I was raised by a man who wanted me to be as independent as possible, so often my strength is noted by friends and foes alike. It has put many men off and I have had to learn how to “be a lady” in some aspects when it comes to the men I have loved.

    I can do everything for and by myself, although the latter took me a minute to truly own. I have adjusting my thinking to no woman is an island, but other than that I believe that as women we can do anything men can do better and in 4 inch heels.

    When I was married my ex said he hated holidays and birthdays because he said everything you want you get out there and get it. *lol* I just looked at him because that is how I was raised, Make it Work was a motto long before I heard Tim Gunn say it.

    I try to show the girls that are in my life that being a woman and being strong are not mutually exclusive through example. I think as women we give our power away far too often. I think that a man taking care of us should not be because we need to be saved but because it’s an expression of love.

    The funny thing is despite my strength, I am a very traditional woman in relationships. I don’t want to make unilateral decisions or run anything I just want to be heard and respected when I have opinions, I want a partnership. However I do want him to be the head, I guess that’s the southern gal in me!

    Let me join you in the corny parade and shout Girl Power! Three times with my pink glove raised!!


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