A bad mama

With the rise of the mommy blogger, it’s not unusual to run across women on the web who are mothers who jokingly call themselves bad Mamas. Hell, I have my days and lately they are often where I feel like a bad Mama. Why you may ask? I sometime feel guilty because I work. Regular readers may recall that a few months ago, the Spousal Unit and I made the decision to pull the girl child out of full-time daycare in our quest to save money. We are fortunate that our jobs provide a great deal of flexibility and girl child is finally at an age where we can work with her underfoot.

The past couple of weeks, it’s been rough around here as we dealt with the flu yet still had work that needed to be done.  From now until Christmas I will be pretty busy as the agency I run does a lot to help folks out and with the economy in shambles, there are a lot of folks in need. Just today I was on the computer doing some work and the girl child walked over and told me I was not playing with her…um, yeah I knew that. Of course when she has those moments it pulls at my heart but at the same time, if I cease to get my work done we as a family will have greater issues. This is the shit I tell myself in those moments when I am dealing with emails that have to be addressed and calls that must be returned.  However at the same time we are spending far more quality time together overall and while it’s a struggle and I feel the guilt when I joke about being a bad Mama, I know that is not the case at all. Yet like many women, its something to say.

Well ladies (Mamas) let me tell you who a real bad Mama is…that would be one Antoinette Nicole Davis, the mother of the now deceased Shaniya Davis who looked to be adorable five-year old. In case you are not familiar with this case little Shaniya was reported missing last week. See after little Shaniya was reported missing and before her body was found, Mama was charged with offering her child for sex, or the official charge is human trafficking and child abuse.

Can I just say upon reading the charges, my blood ran cold. What kind of woman, a mother no less could offer an innocent child for such purposes? There are things that I cannot grasp and this case is one of them. I saw the pictures of Shaniya and she reminded me of my own girl…as a mother even in the worst days when my child is making me lose my mind, the idea of doing anything that could harm her would never ever cross my mind. I look at my children and see the best we can offer in this world, pure innocence

So to hear that a mother would do anything so vile is just outside my realm of understanding in fact I can’t even say that I want to understand it!  However when I am having a bad day, I will not be so quick to call myself a bad mother and I encourage you, if you are a mother and having a bad day to do the same.

Sadly we live in a world where there really are bad mothers and in this case, it appears to be Antoinette Nicole Davis. May little Shaniya find peace in the next life with unconditional love, as the one person in this world who ought to have been that safe harbor, may have done her harm.

 

5 thoughts on “A bad mama”

  1. You know, I attended a child abuse training this week and there were moments that made me want to vomit-literally. The sexual abuse part was the hardest- hearing about babies being raped and having food withheld to reinforce the sucking instinct… I literally cannot imagine. I’m grateful to be able to do my part to make the lives of some children better. There is so much more to do.

  2. That child was just a baby. I must be naive, I didn’t think so much evilness existed. Hearing stories like this, makes me want to believe there is a God, a heaven, that there is a better place this child has ascended.

  3. I just… I can’t… I’m speechless with that woman. How could she? The child was only 5. I just… I don’t understand.

    Makes me reconsider my stance on the death penalty every time… EVERY time.

  4. Reminds me of a case I had 20 years ago. The kid was a preteen. Rescuing her and her younger siblings was extremely complex, intense, and finally, rewarding.

    To this day, her parents, who I’m sure are now dead, were the top five most immoral and sociopathic couples I ever knew. Even the neighborhood crack heads hated them and had no problems telling me when I investigated, and except the ones with bench warrants, volunteering to go to court to testify. What happened in that family was worse than fictional movie Precious based on the book, Push.

    It still makes me sad thinking about it, and for what that child in the news must have gone through before she died.

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