Technically I am off of work this week but that is really just a technicality as my phone is still ringing, emails are still being sent and basically no one seems to have gotten the memo that I am closed for business despite the fact this is my week to decompress before we hit the busy season. It also happen to be the week between preschool ending and day camp starting so I get to pretend I am a stay at home Mom rather than a work out of the home Mom. Can I tell you that I am plain fucking exhausted! The kidlet has the energy of triplets rolled into one body. To say I am exhausted is a understatment but hey what can you do?
Yet I find myself wondering if modern-day parenting is harder than it was say 30 years ago? I was taking a stroll down memory lane yet without my Mum around to ask questions of, maybe I am wrong but I swear my Mom didn’t work nearly as hard as any of the Mamas’ that I know. Play just happened, no dates to arrange, I was mostly left to my own devices. If we played together it was the occasional board game but she never spent hours on end in the floor with me, perhaps it’s because one puzzle and multiple games of dominos later and both the Spousal Unit and I are sore as hell after playing on the floor. So this stuff is on my mind. Yet its in these moments I long for the days of yesteryear in parenting , when I felt less like the manager of child activity and more like a parent.
Today I ended up talking with a woman who initially thought the kidlet was my only child until I explained that I also have an adult child as well and it turned out she had a similar situation though in her case her kids were 17 years apart. We had a good laugh talking about how our parenting evolved, in some ways it was the type of discussion I needed as the woman I was talking to was also African-American. She instinctively seemed to get how with the kidlet I had flipped my parenting script 180 degrees to the point even elder boy has told me that if he tried half of what his sister does the old me probably would not be as gentle as I am now.
Yet lately as I see my girl grow as much as I love her I admit I now question some of the parenting choices we have made but more importantly I wonder if parenting these days is simply harder than it once was? We have so much more as far as activities, technology and the list goes on…you would think our parenting lives would be easier yet it seems we work so much harder to parent than our parents and grandparents ever did. Why is that? I would love to hear your thoughts on the matter.