Unless one is a die-hard contrarian or MAGA type, most white-bodied people live in abject fear of being labeled a racist or coming across as a racist. For some white folks, being labeled as a racist is more hurtful than unpacking the fact that perhaps they do actually hold some racist and harmful views or that they engage in racist behavior. These same types often take umbrage at being called “white” because it makes them feel uncomfortable, though us non-white people live in a world—and have for a long time—where our race is part of our identity and more importantly how we are characterized by white people whether we want it to be or not.
Of course, these thoughts are one of the many sneaky or not-so-sneaky ways that white supremacist culture is deeply embedded in white folks. People will argue you down that naming their whiteness is reverse racism but do nothing to dispel why people are telling them they are racist.
Change isn’t easy; it’s hard work and requires dedicated and sustained intention. As anyone who has ever intentionally tried to make personal change can tell you, it ain’t easy. Whether it’s changing your diet and exercise routine to manage hypertension or diabetes or giving up harmful habits or anything else—even when the intention is there, it is still easy to fail. It’s why we all know that diets rarely work. Sure, you change your habits for a while and lose weight, but eventually we take a break to reward ourselves and slowly momentum is lost and. as any long-time dieter knows, the weight in most cases comes back. Maybe not quickly but eventually.
Rarely are intentions enough when it comes to change and, well, I fear that this election will come down to whether people’s stated intentions and actions are in alignment. Specifically, I am talking about white women. We know that in the last two presidential elections, a lot of white women opted to support Donald Trump for president, even when they had the chance to elect one of their own, Hilary Clinton. Even though the Republicans were working to take away long-held women’s rights.
Since the announcement that Kamala Harris was running instead of Joe Biden, online energy—especially among the chronically online non-leftist types—has been high for Harris. Almost immediately after the announcement that Harris was running, we have seen the formation of several identity-based groups all pledging support for Harris, including white women.
Shannon Watts, founder of Moms Demand Action, activated a Zoom call days after the announcement of Harris’ candidacy. Over 150,000 white women gathered on Zoom and heard from high-profile speakers such as author Glennon Doyle and others. All pumped to break the legacy of white women not showing up, especially for women of color.
White women occupy a unique place in our society. They, too, can be oppressed as women but as white women, they hold the power to be oppressors as well. Even in slavery times, we know white women were complicit in the enslavement of Africans and in some cases owned enslaved Africans. White women have often been the hand maidens and foot soldiers that uphold white supremacy. Sometimes directly, sometimes indirectly. After all, white women were active and on the streets in the 1950s and 1960s demanding that a racially segregated world stay in place. We also know that the words of white women can and have led directly to death and harm for innocent Black and brown people.
While there are a lot of white women in today’s world who do want to escape the most painful parts of the legacy of white womanhood, many do not, despite what they may say. Many of us want to believe that Donald Trump has no shot at getting a second term, but this thing will likely come down to a key factor: whether white women will show up at the ballot box and vote for a Black/Asian woman,
History isn’t on their side and, frankly, while polls should probably be taken with a grain of salt, a poll this week by CNN shows an exceedingly close race, with 48% of people supporting Harris and 47% supporting Trump—and with 50% of white women supporting Trump and 47% supporting Harris.
White ladies, sisters—what thee fuck is up with that?
Given who I am, every white woman I know says they are enthusiastically supporting Harris and while that might be true, most of you almost certainly know white women who are not. The question is, what are you doing to talk to your fellow white sisters? Are you talking to them?
Chances are if you are reading and supporting my work, your intentions will probably align with your actions, but I need you to stop making assumptions about your fellow white women. In fact, I need you to start having hard conversations with yourselves and resist the knee-jerk reactions that cause many of you to immediately become defensive.
Acknowledging the complicated history that white women have with oppression is important, as is realizing that shame doesn’t serve you but what will is honest acknowledgement so that we can stop worrying about the trustworthiness of white women. Also, diving deeper to unpack why so many white women continue to align with systems and people that are harmful to them and their daughters.
Are the dividends of whiteness worth the continued stripping of your humanity as women—the stripping of your daughters’ and granddaughters’ autonomy and humanity?
After the 2016 election, white women started to activate in the aftermath of Trump’s win and said they were ready to be allies and put in the work. Honestly, as a group overall, y’all flaked on us. I know not all “all y’all” but enough of y’all that while I want to believe it will be different this time, I am also bracing for the fact that whiteness could very well be the winner on November 5.
Personally, I think one of the biggest barriers for white women is a willingness to be a disruptor. White womanhood isn’t by its nature disruptive. How many of y’all are ready and willing to rock the boats and lose loved ones over this election? How many of y’all will put targets on your backs and break the cultural norms and start those uncomfortable conversations and push buttons? What will you give up to do better and break the cycle of destruction of white womanhood?
It is not uncommon for white women to admire the strength and resilience of Black and brown women, but what about working on your strength and resilience to break from what harms us all?
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