Today’s post is inspired by a late night twitter conversation that I stumbled into that made me think on a few things. It seems like all of sudden, sex is everywhere and I am talking places you least expect it, like Middle America soccer moms.
Books like 50 Shades of Grey and movies like Magic Mike are being openly discussed, genital relaxation devices, can now be found on the shelf at your drug store and no longer require mail order or going into a store surrounded by creepy men who go in the back and get happy!. Sex is out and about and no longer just the purview of the young and sexy.
Terms like sex positive didn’t exist when I was coming up and I barely remember hearing terms such as pansexual. People are opening up more about interest in things such as S & M, even taboo topics such as open marriage has hit primetime.
For some people, all this sex talk is a bit too much with many people still feeling that sex is a private matter that should only be discussed between a few select folks. However for some of us especially those of us who grew up with religiously conservative backgrounds, reaching the point we can discuss sex without feeling a twinge of shame publicly is great.
Sex is natural, it serves a primal need, it helps keep the planet filled with new humans and it’s awesome when done well. I think that women in particular need to have a few people in their lives that they are comfortable talking sex with…it’s nice to know that your sudden surge in libido is perfectly normal. That as a women hits her late 30’s and early 40’s, in many cases her libido will shock the shit out of her and that she might be the one wearing her partner out on a regular basis.
While I still think 50 Shades of Grey is a craptastic book, it makes the seemingly unnatural seem natural to many women. Repressing ourselves sexually is stressful, limiting ourselves because something seems dirty, limits us. I think that stretching ourselves and growing as humans includes accepting and honoring the growth that our sexual selves ask of us as well.
So if you still find yourself blushing when conversations of sex come up, ask yourself why? Why hold onto someone else’s script on sexual matters. While discretion is always a good thing, as a tweep mentioned last night if one lacks an offline community where they can get raw and talks about such matters maybe cultivating connections online where you can talk safely is key.
I often find it funny that as popular as discussing babies and childrearing is, that we rarely talk about the process that made the babies possible. We often downplay the significance of such activities instead of honoring that sexual part of ourselves.
Talk sex, it will keep you happy and healthy and inspire you to have more of it which is always a good thing.