This is one of those vents that generally just resides in my head, but for some reason I just need to let it out. Maybe its the new gig or the fact that my family of origin is tweaking or I am perimenopausal but I need to publicly vent.
How come folks act like shit happens to them and they have no choices? Seriously, people act like things happen in a vacuum and they have no role whatsoever in their life circumstances. Case in point, I have a family member who is supposed to visit once a year yet for the last two years he hasn’t….oh what the hell, its my Pops. Now Pops claims he has no money to spend to get here, well I call bullshit on that one. See, ever since my Mom passed, I know that Pops has been imbibing a bit, so in my opinion if you got money to grab a drink with buddies after work, guess what you got money to visit family. Nope, you choose not to visit, its ok, I will get over it but don’t act like you have no choice. See, I figured if my Pops put away $10 a week, at 52 weeks in a year that is more than enough to fly out here even with higher airfare. Sorry, Pops but I call bullshit. Yeah, I am a little cold putting my Pops out here like this but the truth will set us free and some shit just needs to be said.
Next point of shit that annoys me, poor folks. Now look, I got nothing against poor folks shit I been poor but guess what I didn’t keep having babies I couldn’t afford and then get mad when the social service folks and others are not all that jazzed to help my Black ass out. I believe that in the ideal world everyone’s basic needs would be provided for, shelter, food, medical care….however we don’t live in the ideal world and while my life’s work has been about helping the less fortunate, there are times I want to smack folks upside the head.
When you got a nicer car than me, yet I need to help you provide essentials for your kids because you say you cannot do it, I gotta be honest and say I wonder about your priorities. Shit, me and the spousal unit will willing go without to provide for our kids, see once again its that pesky choice factor.
My daughter is at that age that she wants a baby sister, well truth is that barring a direct sign from God that is not likely to happen, elder boy turns 17 in less than 2 months, and this college shit is weighing on me. I got this house shit to deal with plus that mountain of debt to whittle down, as my Granny used to say, I don’t have a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of. My finances are fucked and we are most likely heading towards a depression, so if I slipped up and got pregnant knowing I am broke and can barely afford the two kids I got now, well that’s a poor choice and honestly I would be dumb as hell.
So while its always easy to blame others for shit, sometimes we have to look at the decsions we choose to make, sometimes life does happen and it brings bad shit but sometimes poor choices on our part cause bad shit too.