Protect us from the simpletons

Sorry I have been MIA for longer than usual, but both me and the little one have been battling some nasty bug. Plus I have clients going crazy which has meant little time for blogging.

Anyway today as the spousal unit and I once again were discussing the sorry state of America and the 2008 election and the fact that Sarah “Simpleton” Palin seems to be wowing the average American. I was reminded that once upon a time in America white folks tried to prevent Black folks from voting by creating poll taxes and literacy tests. My father is old enough to have seen his father subjected to these inhumane practices, thankfully the Voting Rights Act of 1965 did away with this nonsense. Which is why what I am about to say will seem crazy as hell.

I say we need to make a test that all voting age Americans who register to vote must take, now no this would not be a basic literacy test. It would be a test of the issues facing the nation, you know shit like the state of the economy, real threats not the shit that we are hearing from folks who would have us to believe we are on some sort of mission from God. Now the Blues Brothers is one of my favorites movies and when they dropped that line in the flick, it was funny as hell yet when I hear vice presidential candidates basically state we are on a mission from God, now that shit makes my blood run cold. I admit I am a former pacifist and while I do believe there are times when wars are unavoidable lets not make a habit of fighting for the sake of fighting either.

When folks start basing their voting choices off the fact that so and so seems nice and like them, I say its time to do something drastic hence the creation of the issues test. If you can’t pass a test that shows you really know what’s going on in the world then guess what no voting rights for you until you can pass the test. Now I know some folks will scream its discriminatory as hell, yep it is but maybe voting should be a  right you gotta earn similar to driving a car. You need to prove you know what the fuck is going on, see after almost 8 years of Bush-Cheney we cannot afford another 4 years in the same sad sack state where our rights our being eroded and America is slipping into second world status but as long as the plasma tv and 1000 channels works on the cable we sit by and wonder why gas and food is going up.

Nope, the voting test means folks would have to think more critically than any of the shit that is spewed on Fox News and while I don’t want to see folks of color disenfranchised, this little test would also rid the voting pool of a fair chunk of white folks too so it would be fair.

Now if only we could make this test mandatory for the folks running for office, after all just because Alaska is close to Russia does not give one any idea of what goes on over there.

In any event, my plan is radical and unthinkable but at least a girl can dream.

Sarah..the secret weapon

So last night I stayed up (damn near fell asleep) to catch the GOP’s vice-presidential candidate Sarah Palin give her speech. I daresay that after having to endure Mike Huckabee’s bad attempt at humor (glad to know he got some real soap when he went to college), I almost turned off the tv but I must say I am glad I waited to catch Mizz Sarah’s debut on the world stage.

Houston, we may have a problem. Notice I did not say we have one, I said we may have one. See after spending all weekend wondering what the fuck was goings on in McNasty’s mind, after seeing the multi-talented Sarah on stage, I now see why he chose her. Screw getting Hillary’s angry ass supporters, no Sarah speaks to the that rather large group that my boy Obama just cannot seem to wrap his arms around. Sarah speaks directly to that group that says, well the Repubs got nothing for me but damn it, I don’t know about that Negra with the funny name. Never mind that the reality is that both Michelle and Barack Obama’s life stories are the stories this country was built on.. pull yourself up by your boot straps. Problem is Obama and Michelle, I suspect like me, you won’t ever catch them hunting anything, to middle America they just seem different. But Sarah, she is like every-woman (actually a women at the redneck hoedown did say say Sarah was like every woman), even down to the bad ass kids she can’t control.

Damn it, I think even the pregnant daughter story might actually work to her and McNasty’s good. See the folks they hope to capture, are the kinda folks whose kids do go to the military and maybe even have babies early. McNasty maybe you are not the senile fool, I thought you were but you are still crazy as hell.

Now thinking folks know Sarah didn’t say shit of substance, for a nobody she came out talking shit and reading her lines the way the fancy scriptwriters told her, and while it may laughable to even think she could actually help McNasty win, remember that most Americans are not critical thinkers. Gas is $4 a gallon and folks don’t want to hear that they have to change their lifestyle, in other words stop pushing the whip when you are only going a mile away from home. So when we hear drilling that sounds good as hell, fuck the fact that its a short term solution at best. People don’t wanna hear that, and McNasty and Sarah surely won’t make folks listen to that nonsense, by all means drill and lets create new energy sources. Clearly neither Sarah or McNasty are familiar with James Howard Kunstler, maybe they should google him and get a better understanding about how life in America will eventually be, but that’s another post.

Nope, Sarah has a spunkiness that definitely came through, kinda like a Norma Ray. In that speech I saw at least 2 maybe 3 different persona’s, scrappy fighter woman, shit-talker and them just every day Mom and wife whose just been with her guy for 2 decades and 5 kids.

All this to say that Obama, me and you may not see eye to eye on all the issues but I want you to win, look maybe you need to look a sista up in Maine, see I am originally from the Chi-town but after years in Maine, I know how to connect with small town folks. I think you need some lessons on how to connect, maybe we can get on a boat and catch some lobster, imagine that photo op. All jokes aside, the Obama campaign has just received notice that they cannot be caught sleeping because Sarah’s mission is to assist in getting that working class vote that would escape a guy like Obama and maybe even McCain and not to be a pessimist, but I think she’s got a shot.

More observations on the redneck hoedown later, but its early here in Maine so time to drink my coffee.

What was she thinking, better yet what was he thinking?

Come on now, you know the kid couldn’t resist getting in on the discussion about Sarah Palin. Seriously as busy as I have been seeing off elder child and working on deadline, I have been paying attention to the news. Damn, McNasty must have been hard up to pick Sarah Palin. Its a shame I am not a Rethuglican since I am almost certain that I am more qualified for the VP slot then ole Sarah, plus I am not about to be a granny at an insanely young age either.

All jokes aside, when I first heard he picked Sarah, I though, wow! However once I heard the rumors about how the last baby she had a few months ago might be her daughter’s, I got confused and thought I was watching a bad Lifetime flick entitled Mama’s Love or some shit like that. Then yesterday when I heard that her 17 yo daughter Bristol was pregnant, I nearly fell out my chair and started wondering what the fuck were these folks thinking?

Seriously, anybody who would sign up to play second banana to McCain pretty much knows that should he win, the man is old and with a history of cancer could kick the bucket on the job, thus catapulting the second banana into a starring role as leader of the free world. That said, might it be a good idea to pick someone whose not embroiled in their own version of a soap opera… rumors of babies that aren’t really yours, pregnant teens, ethics investigations. All things that say to me, maybe if I had that type of shit going on in my life, maybe trying to VP is a bad idea.

Now I hear the Evangelicals are trying to spin this into a positive, poor Bristol is human, yep I agree and like all humans she is flawed. I got that. However aren’t these the same assholes who would be talking greasy if this were a poor girl of color, placing blame on loose morals? 

However since I am on deadline, I need to wrap this up but not before I pose the question that has been driving me crazy, what kind of Mama would be so eager to take on a job, that she would sacrifice her own kids? IMO someone who shouldn’t be trying to lead or be in charge of shit. See, I know this is a private family matter and while Obama may want to take the high road on this matter, as others have stated, if this was one of Obama’s girls, the Republicans would be all over this like white on rice, trying to assassinate Barack and Michelle’s character. Yet because its a hard working Christian Mama its ok? I call bullshit on that.

No Sarah, you ain’t fooling no one with the look of being super Mama, willing to deliver speeches and fly 13 hours to have your baby after your water broke. Beyotch please, after my water broke, all I wanted to do was lay down and moan… who in their right mind gets on a plane bypassing a zillion hospitals to have a baby 13 hours away. Um, nobody, at least no one sane unless they were trying to plan a clever ruse to claim their daughter’s baby as their own. However maybe I am wrong and you just really liked your OB in Alaska, If it turns out I am wrong, well I will kick the butts for a day. How about that?

With regards to Bristol, I hope she really loves her baby’s daddy and isn’t being forced into a marriage that is the result of a youthful indiscretion all because Mommy is a pro-life wack job that believes in marriage.

As for McCain, I hope Sarah ain’t got no more secrets in the closet otherwise your plan to land the PUMAS is really going wrong. Though I can’t help wondering when you looked at Sarah, in her naughty librarian getup where you looking for a little side action from Cindy’s ice queen routine?